Expansionism (Unfolding Saga, Pt. 4)

Ryan reached into his pocket and pulled out the papers Dawn brought over last night. She had printed out directions to a couple of places and last night she and Ryan got online and looked them up trying to decide which one to pick while I sat on the couch and listened to Great Lake Swimmers. The fourth song on that album was so eerie and beautiful at the same time; reassuring, but in a strange way, free and connected while disconnecting. "I don't know what to do with this gift you gave me," I thought. "This never ending maze I'm trapped in. Why I ever went down that impossible road with you, I will never know. Nothing brings me closer to now than distant memory and again I sit here now and realize I am stuck and I can do nothing else but remember anymore. You are impossible!"

"Smoke?"

"Yeah, dude," I responded and stood up with Ryan and went out onto the front lawn.

"Have you seen Steve's backyard?"

And I hadn't and so we went through the gate and Steve was watering the plants and Ryan told me about all of the work Steve has done, and how it reminded him of my brother and Alexis with their house and I didn't see the resemblance but thought it must have been just a cursory reminder to Ryan who has only seen pictures on Steve's blog. It must have shown on my face because Ryan said, "Just having a yard, is all, and working on it. This yard looks completely different now than it did," and I could appreciate what he was saying. He went back around front while I took a moment and finished my cigarette and then put it out and dropped it in the trashcan that was sitting up against Steve's house.

I went back inside and sat down on the floor in Dawn's living room. Ryan was packing the car outside and Dawn was packing her bag on the couch. "How cold do you think it will be?" she asked.

"I don't know. Ryan said he thinks it will probably get down to the lower 30's and really, I know nothing."

She smiled. "Well, I can't decide whether or not to take this jacket," and she held up a black, down, puffy jacket. "You can wear it if you want. If you get too cold."

I looked at her for a moment and thought that she probably wanted to bring it and I told her that if she wanted, I'd put it in my pack and carry it for her and she said "ok" and stuffed it into a very small stuff sack and threw it to me. I took it outside and opened my bag, which was laying on the lawn, and pushed it in on top. I was getting quite warm in the sun. I cinched up the top and picked up the pack and put it on. Surprisingly comfortable and surprisingly light, though I wasn't sure what it would be like up in the mountains.